We tend to see successful people when they have achieved their peak performance and are at last being recognized for it. In sport, we've all seen the classic moment when the Olympic athlete ascends the dais to be awarded a medal and the unspoken promise of future fame, and who knows, maybe even a stint on a box of Wheaties.
The same is true of success in other areas of life. At the peak of your academic career so far, your high school graduation, you walked across a stage, received a rolled up scroll of paper (which was likely a fake just for "show," rather than your actual diploma), shook a hand or two, and descended the stairs to return to your seat in the crowd. Sure, your family and friends waved and cheered, but their hoopla was kept to a minimum, so the next graduate could move in to grab a fleeting moment of glory.
Our culture obsesses over these "summit moments," lifts them up as the end-all-be-all of our existence. We're led to believe that the whole point of life is to get to these moments, as many of them as we can, as soon as we can. Nothing else matters.
As a result, we forget or we ignore all the day-to-day moments that are stitched together in our memories as one long, continuous quilt of the ordinary. And a sweaty, tattered quilt it is, since there's a lot of work going on between summit moments. There is no glamour in the daily grind. No recognition for getting up every day to do the thing that needs to be done over and over again until the work adds up to something worthwhile.
The goal is sexy. A college degree. It sounds good when we announce it to friends and family. The work to achieve this goal is difficult and sometimes repetitive. It's truly fascinating stuff, but wait, what, that's required and really time-consuming? And I'm tired? Naw, that's boring. As hell.
Maybe you've discovered this unfortunate truth. The college experience isn't the endless party you were sold at the movies. And it isn't a free-for-all intellectual orgy of scholarly debate in a hallowed hall, like that dream when you stood up at a podium and said something so completely brilliant that everyone fell silent in amazement.
It's waking up to the subtle smell of your roommate's dirty socks that have crept across the floor to your side of the room, and knowing that you have to greet another day's work despite this unlaundered hostility. Or, it's the bleary-eyed commute from home on the two-lane highway past the cattle that don't have a clue about how hard you are working. It's the seemingly endless paper trail of homework that you are beginning to see stretching out ahead of you until it meets some point on the horizon and disappears in a weary blur.
This is why it's important to appreciate a sunrise or sunset when you can, and make friends, especially with people who have their head down in the books as much as you do. Do an occasional fun thing, be as gentle with yourself as you are able, and then get back to that latest dreaded piece of work that needs to get done.
This is the ugly work of your eventual achievement.
People wouldn't keep doing it if it wasn't worth doing.
Your thoughts?
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Self-talk
According to Jim Taylor, "confidence is the
single most important mental factor for success in sports" (41). And remember, academics is just sports for the mind! If this is a fair comparison, then it's worth looking at how we rate our confidence.
Right now, put your finger on the pulse of your self-confidence. How strong is that beat? When you get up each morning, what do you say to yourself about how you will perform that day? If you hear trash talk, then it's time to throw it out. I'm not making this up. What we say to ourselves matters. Stephen J. Bull et. al. point out that "one of the most important determinants of developing and maintaining confidence is what athletes [students] say to themselves" (43). If we're putting ourselves down, then we're missing an opportunity to help ourselves out, on the court, on the field, or as Dr. Suess might say, in the rain and on a train, with a goat, etc.
Bull et. al. list examples of positive affirmations for athletes like "I am strong" and "I can stay focused under pressure" (44). Yes, these may sound cheesy. Disco sounded cheesy, too, but that didn't keep millions of people from enjoying it for more years than was thought humanly possible. Try it. You can boost your confidence with words, no tacky white leisure suit necessary.
Jim Taylor adds that it takes more than just words. Preparation, practice, struggle, and success are four other factors that help our self-confidence (49-50). First say it, then do it. It will take work.
Don't forget to call on your past achievements. I've been doing this for years without even knowing it. Sometimes when I'm in the middle of a stressful situation, I will say, "You can do this. You are a college graduate." This once helped me get the last pickle out of the jar...and I didn't even take that class. Recalling your successes can be a great reminder that you have made progress toward your goals - the very fact that you are sitting here reading this blog post proves it.
Write a post discussing your own level of confidence. What can you say to yourself that will increase your confidence about school work? Or better yet, what can you stop saying to yourself that will increase your confidence about school work?
Right now, put your finger on the pulse of your self-confidence. How strong is that beat? When you get up each morning, what do you say to yourself about how you will perform that day? If you hear trash talk, then it's time to throw it out. I'm not making this up. What we say to ourselves matters. Stephen J. Bull et. al. point out that "one of the most important determinants of developing and maintaining confidence is what athletes [students] say to themselves" (43). If we're putting ourselves down, then we're missing an opportunity to help ourselves out, on the court, on the field, or as Dr. Suess might say, in the rain and on a train, with a goat, etc.
Bull et. al. list examples of positive affirmations for athletes like "I am strong" and "I can stay focused under pressure" (44). Yes, these may sound cheesy. Disco sounded cheesy, too, but that didn't keep millions of people from enjoying it for more years than was thought humanly possible. Try it. You can boost your confidence with words, no tacky white leisure suit necessary.
Jim Taylor adds that it takes more than just words. Preparation, practice, struggle, and success are four other factors that help our self-confidence (49-50). First say it, then do it. It will take work.
Don't forget to call on your past achievements. I've been doing this for years without even knowing it. Sometimes when I'm in the middle of a stressful situation, I will say, "You can do this. You are a college graduate." This once helped me get the last pickle out of the jar...and I didn't even take that class. Recalling your successes can be a great reminder that you have made progress toward your goals - the very fact that you are sitting here reading this blog post proves it.
Write a post discussing your own level of confidence. What can you say to yourself that will increase your confidence about school work? Or better yet, what can you stop saying to yourself that will increase your confidence about school work?
Works Cited
Bull, Stephen J., Ph.D., John G.
Albinson, Ph.D., and Christopher J. Shambrook, Ph.D. The Mental Game Plan.
East Sussex, UK: Sports Dynamics, 1996. Print.
Taylor, Jim. Prime Sport: Triumph
of the Athlete Mind. New York: Writers Club Press, 2001. Print.
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Focus
I want to open this post by inviting you to make this a national day of service, in memory of the people whose lives were lost on 9/11/01. If you are working or going to school today, I encourage you to participate by finding small ways to serve others through random, or not so random, acts of kindness.
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College demands mental toughness, especially the ability to focus for longer stretches of time. There are more pages to be read and papers to be written, experiments and problem sets to complete, with no one forcing you to sit down and get it done. Put this along side our hyper-digital, hyper-connectedness, and you have a near guarantee of slow-to-no-progress and the makings of a PhD in procrastination.
"Focus," says sports psychologist Terry Orlick, "is the first and most important element of success" (11). He believes that to perform at our best, we have to train ourselves to focus more often and more effectively. To do this, he recommends what he calls a "distraction control plan" (94), which looks like this:
1. Make a list of the most common distractions, whatever prevents you from studying or getting homework done.
2. Identify your usual way of responding to these distractions.
3. If your response is taking you away from your work, brainstorm a new way of responding that will allow you to stay focused.
4. Create a positive word or phrase that will help you to refocus.
I recommend starting small. Don't expect to study for five hours straight each night, especially since most studies suggest that paying attention for this long is humanly impossible. Try not to dwell on ALL the work you have to get done. Instead, figure out what needs to be done first and try to devote yourself to that completely. When I start to get wigged out by my to do list, one of my favorite mantras is "one thing at a time." I've also been known to say, "I can do this. I have a college degree." These are pretty obvious, pretty boring really, but they work. Maybe I'll try something more exciting in the future. If you hear me say, "Mush, rodeo clown, make it happen!" You will know I'm tweaking my refocusing methods.
What about you? What can you do to minimize distractions and maximize your focus? Work through the steps above and try a new way of responding to distractions during your next study session. Just try it for one day. Then, write a blog post discussing the highs and lows of your experience with Orlick's Distraction Control Plan.
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College demands mental toughness, especially the ability to focus for longer stretches of time. There are more pages to be read and papers to be written, experiments and problem sets to complete, with no one forcing you to sit down and get it done. Put this along side our hyper-digital, hyper-connectedness, and you have a near guarantee of slow-to-no-progress and the makings of a PhD in procrastination.
"Focus," says sports psychologist Terry Orlick, "is the first and most important element of success" (11). He believes that to perform at our best, we have to train ourselves to focus more often and more effectively. To do this, he recommends what he calls a "distraction control plan" (94), which looks like this:
1. Make a list of the most common distractions, whatever prevents you from studying or getting homework done.
2. Identify your usual way of responding to these distractions.
3. If your response is taking you away from your work, brainstorm a new way of responding that will allow you to stay focused.
4. Create a positive word or phrase that will help you to refocus.
I recommend starting small. Don't expect to study for five hours straight each night, especially since most studies suggest that paying attention for this long is humanly impossible. Try not to dwell on ALL the work you have to get done. Instead, figure out what needs to be done first and try to devote yourself to that completely. When I start to get wigged out by my to do list, one of my favorite mantras is "one thing at a time." I've also been known to say, "I can do this. I have a college degree." These are pretty obvious, pretty boring really, but they work. Maybe I'll try something more exciting in the future. If you hear me say, "Mush, rodeo clown, make it happen!" You will know I'm tweaking my refocusing methods.
What about you? What can you do to minimize distractions and maximize your focus? Work through the steps above and try a new way of responding to distractions during your next study session. Just try it for one day. Then, write a blog post discussing the highs and lows of your experience with Orlick's Distraction Control Plan.
Works Cited
Orlick, Terry. In Pursuit of
Excellence. Champaign: Human Kinetics, 2008. Print.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Perseverance
All you have to do is google the name Diana Nyad and you will find out what courage and perseverance can lead to. The LA Times, one newspaper among thousands, is reporting that this Labor Day weekend Diana Nyad became the first person to swim from Cuba to Florida without a shark cage. That's 110 miles. She covered it in 52 hours. Oh, and she's 64 years-old, if that matters ("Diana Nyad completes..."). You can read all the juicy details here, and on thousands of other websites.
The first time I heard about Nyad, I thought she was a nut. I didn't know anything about her, except that last year she failed to complete the Cuba to Florida swim. What I did not bother to find out is that she failed several times before finally completing the swim. I didn't look beyond what I thought was a "failure story." I judged her without bothering to find out more. As I learned more yesterday, I came to realize that she is a world-class athlete and journalist who spends her time swimming, writing, and speaking words of inspiration to anyone who is blessed enough to be within hearing.
What kind of mental toughness does it take to set a world record? What kind of courage and perseverance does it take to fail, not once, not twice, but four times, and still be willing to try again? What does it mean to swim from Cuba to Florida in open waters without the protection of a shark cage?
For me, Nyad's open swim in treacherous waters is the perfect metaphor for the college experience. She has had access to specialized equipment, lots of highly trained help, and years of training, just like the average college student. In spite of all this help, it was Nyad alone who had to decide that this was her goal. It was Nyad who had to commit herself to years of training, injuries, setbacks and failures. No one could install a high level of commitment into her, like a software download of Human Determination 2.0. It had to come from within her. Like Nyad, you must commit yourself to swim the mysteriously and challenging waters that stretch from here to graduation day. Like Nyad, you must look within yourself to find the courage and perseverance needed to make it to the other shore.
The good news is that recent research points to mental toughness as a common factor among people who reach their goals. At times it has been a more important predictor of success than even IQ. Angela Duckworth, a research at the University of Pennsylvania, has studied this combination of passion and perseverance and named it "grit." ("The Key to Success"). Watch Angela Duckworth's TED talk on grit here. Then write a post about the how passion and perseverance might help you to succeed in college.
When in doubt in these first days of the semester, as Dory says, "Just keep swimming."
And count on me for support. Like Bruce, I find that "fish are friends, not food" (Finding Nemo).
The first time I heard about Nyad, I thought she was a nut. I didn't know anything about her, except that last year she failed to complete the Cuba to Florida swim. What I did not bother to find out is that she failed several times before finally completing the swim. I didn't look beyond what I thought was a "failure story." I judged her without bothering to find out more. As I learned more yesterday, I came to realize that she is a world-class athlete and journalist who spends her time swimming, writing, and speaking words of inspiration to anyone who is blessed enough to be within hearing.
What kind of mental toughness does it take to set a world record? What kind of courage and perseverance does it take to fail, not once, not twice, but four times, and still be willing to try again? What does it mean to swim from Cuba to Florida in open waters without the protection of a shark cage?
For me, Nyad's open swim in treacherous waters is the perfect metaphor for the college experience. She has had access to specialized equipment, lots of highly trained help, and years of training, just like the average college student. In spite of all this help, it was Nyad alone who had to decide that this was her goal. It was Nyad who had to commit herself to years of training, injuries, setbacks and failures. No one could install a high level of commitment into her, like a software download of Human Determination 2.0. It had to come from within her. Like Nyad, you must commit yourself to swim the mysteriously and challenging waters that stretch from here to graduation day. Like Nyad, you must look within yourself to find the courage and perseverance needed to make it to the other shore.
The good news is that recent research points to mental toughness as a common factor among people who reach their goals. At times it has been a more important predictor of success than even IQ. Angela Duckworth, a research at the University of Pennsylvania, has studied this combination of passion and perseverance and named it "grit." ("The Key to Success"). Watch Angela Duckworth's TED talk on grit here. Then write a post about the how passion and perseverance might help you to succeed in college.
When in doubt in these first days of the semester, as Dory says, "Just keep swimming."
And count on me for support. Like Bruce, I find that "fish are friends, not food" (Finding Nemo).
Works Cited
Duckworth, Angela. The key
to success? Grit. TED. TED
conferences LLC, May 2013. Web. 3 Sept. 2013.
<http://www.ted.com/talks/angela_lee_duckworth_the_key_to_success_grit.html>.
Finding Nemo. Dir. Andrew Stanton and Lee Unkrich. Buena Vista Home
Entertainment, 2003. Film.
Pearce, Matt. "Diana Nyad completes Cuba-to-Florida swim,
reaches a lifelong dream." Los
Angeles Times [Los Angeles] 2 Sept. 2013, Nation: n. pag. Los Angeles Times. Web. 3 Sept. 2013.
<http://www.latimes.com/nation/la-na-diana-nyad-20130903,0,3322544.story>.
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